HDTV WILL BROADCAST NUDE IMAGES

IT'S TRUE. UNDER CERTAIN CIRCUMSTANCES INVOLVING SUN SPOTS AND HIGH POWERED TRANSMITTERS, HIGH DEFINITION WILL ACTUALLY PIERCE THE CLOTHING BARRIER AND REVEAL BARE SKIN. Some viewers of the soaps and other recently broadcast series have already complained about seeing a little too much in the way of five o-clock shadows, skin pores, and nose hair, but no one ever anticipated that the properties of high def will in some situations result in naked actors prancing across the tv screens of middle America. "Nobody foresaw this, of course" acknowledges Raymond Chu, Vice President of Engineering at SoundWave Mediums. "Those of us who first saw the technology in its infancy were blown away by the quality improvement, and thought we were doing a good thing. But, honestly, now we wonder what we've done. It may be years, if ever, before we can reverse the problem with IBN (Involuntary Broadcast Nudity). And if you think that this new "feature" that High Def will bring may increase tv watching, it's probably because your first thought wasn't about the people on television you don't want to see without clothes. Television stations are already setting aside financial reserves in anticipation of lower viewerships once people realize that suddenly someone like Rosie O'Donnell may appear on home screens a little too highly defined --station owners fear the result will be sets thrown in the garbage, and more people reading books and playing tennis. Naturally, Paris Hilton is delighted. "I want everyone to know that I was way ahead of everybody in this technological thing. It's beyond hot. I think when everyone is naked on High Def people will like you know be able to break the ice better and a lot of problems in the world will be solved" And of course there has already been one lawsuit filed, by a man in California who claims he was emotionally damaged when he inadvertently caught a glimpse of actors on THE BOLD AND THE BEAUTIFUL sans clothes. This site will be following this story closely. H. Bun